Posted by: lonelyonzebes | August 16, 2010

Don’t Panic. Just Watch Nature.

Business has been picking up with the recent Metroid scare, though most of it has been false alarms. No word yet on the Special Squadron, but the people are becoming visibly frightened. Though late-night comedy shows try to make light of the situation (I’ve heard they make jokes about me, too, which makes me smile), fear of Metroids is making everyone behave irrationally. The bounty postings are literally flooded with requests to track down a missing person, pet, and – get this – a car. I kid you not, some guy was convinced a Metroid had stolen his car, driven right off into the sunset with it. I have had to change my settings for bounty reports yet again. This whole thing is starting to become a barely-controlled panic.

All this, and very few people have ever seen a live Metroid. And I hope they never have to.

If you want my advice, just take a look at the sky outside your window. And if you’re on a planet where it’s safe to crack a window and listen to the wind, do so. If the world is going to end and there’s nothing you can do about it, stop worrying and love life to the fullest. You can learn all that just by looking at nature.



  1. Now I feel superficial.
    I really like your posts lonelyonzebes.

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